Screenplay: Buck Henry (story by Charles Shyer, Nancy Meyers, and Harvey Miller)
Role: Sunny Davis
Actor: Goldie Hawn
Length: approx. 1 minute minimum
You wanna know something? That before I started to work for the government, I’d never read the Constitution. I didn’t even begin to know how things worked. I didn’t. I didn’t read the newspaper, except to look at my horoscope, and I never read the Declaration of Independence. But I know they had, the ones we’re talking about – the ‘experts’ – they all read it. They just forgot what it’s about, that it’s about ‘We the People.’ And that’s me. I’m ‘We the People’, and you’re ‘We the People’, and all of us, we’re all ‘We the People’, right? So when they sell me that ten-cent diamond, or down the river, or – or to some guy who wears a lot of medals, that means they’re selling all of us, all of ‘We the People.’ And when they, I mean, when you guys, when you spend another pile of money, and when you give away or sell all those guns and tanks and planes, and every time you invite another foreign big-shot to the White House and hug and kiss them and give them presents, it has a direct effect on ‘We the People”s lives!
So if we don’t – I mean, if I don’t know what you’re up to, and if I – if I don’t holler and scream when I think you’re doing it wrong, and if I just mind my own business and don’t vote or care, then I just get what I deserve. So now that I’m Sunny Davis, private citizen again, you’re gonna have to watch out for me, ’cause I’m gonna be watching all of you – like a hawk!